


At the Mouth of Hell

by yvochrali



Series: The Retoldverse [10]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anger Management, Bittersweet Ending, Character Study, Gen, Hellmouth (BtVS), High School, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Memories, No Romance, POV Faith Lehane, Past Character Death, Season/Series 03, Strong Female Characters, Sunnydale (BtVS)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-18
Updated: 2020-09-18
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:21:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26530552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yvochrali/pseuds/yvochrali
Summary: When you are staring into the Mouth of Hell, nothing seems to scare you more than your own buried memories, emotions and choices. A young woman, still only a girl, has already seen the worst of humanity, but despite this...Fear still manages to find a way to co-exist inside of her already battered heart. Part 10 of the Retoldverse. Set in Season 3.
Series: The Retoldverse [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1891282
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	At the Mouth of Hell

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own the Buffyverse. If I did, Faith wouldn´t just be a "recurring character".
> 
> Faith: Thanks?
> 
> (nods vigorously) You should. More screentime would be beneficial to your character development. 
> 
> Giles: (mutters under his breath) If she doesn´t have enough already...
> 
> Oi! No talking! Don´t think I´ve forgotten how rude you were to me not so long ago!
> 
> Giles: (sarcastically) Joy.

**The Mouth of Hell**

**Set in Season 3**

Once again, Faith found herself in the library, staring down at the reason for her gruesome fate. She seemed to frequent it quite a bit recently. Especially since her little _chat_ with Cordelia, who, despite her aloof and self-centred personality, was rather quickly beginning to grow on the younger slayer, who she found incredibly interesting and a breath of fresh air from her usual company. 

The Scoobies were good people if those even existed, but they weren´t exactly _accepting_ of Faith´s more outlandish and thrill-seeking character. They tended to look at her like she was some kind of foreign species from another planet. Then again, maybe she was to them. At least Buffy liked her. Some of Faith´s more memorable experiences had been with the older slayer, who aside from being extremely irritating at times, was great fun when she let loose and stopped acting like a stuck-up brat with a stick up her arse. 

Faith smirked; one of her favourite ways of getting Buffy to "let loose" was by continuously trying to "seduce" her fellow slayer, who honestly believed that Faith was _actually_ being serious. Faith briefly entertained the idea that Buffy _may_ have possibly been turned on by her. 

The little blonde was cute like that. Flailing around, all hot and flustered as she struggled to respond to Faith´s more _provocative_ commentary. 

She shook her head. Nah, Buffy was as straight as a white picket fence; besides, you´d never know until ya tried it. 

But for now, Faith had something far more captivating to focus on besides her thoughts that consistently varied between "shrinky", "depressing" or "unorthodox". (Yes, she knew words that had more than two syllables)

The Hellmouth. 

It was a little freaky to think that the literal "Mouth of Hell" was right below her feet, masked by an innocent-looking oak floor. She could feel its luring presence. The level of darkness that stirred down below was utterly terrifying and she had to fervently ignore the part of her brain that urged her to bolt away into the night; far away, not that Faith would ever admit that to anyone, not even to herself. The face of fake bravo and overwhelming self-confidence was as much a part of her facade as her "Slut-o-rama" clothes were. Cordelia really had to learn to keep her words to herself, not that they impacted Faith in the slightest. She´d grown used to people judging her just because they could.

The younger slayer frowned as she gazed down on the wooden floor. _Time to live up to your facade, Lehane._

Crouching down, she cautiously pressed her hand down on the smooth, oak floor. Unexpectedly, she felt a surge of power; dark, cold and tempting. She shivered; how did nobody else feel this? They´d had plenty "Offical Scooby gatherings" right in this every room, but...nobody had ever mentioned _this_. Not even Buffy, who had been the slayer far longer than she had.

What was so different about _her_? 

Contrary to "common knowledge", Faith was not stupid. Her grades at school were certainly better than Xander or Buffy´s, who she was beginning to think simply used the slaying gig as an excuse to not do her school work.

People also often thought of Faith as competitive, when the truth was that she really wasn´t. She fought for herself and nobody else, but when the stakes were high...she tucked her tailed between her legs, gathered all of her remaining self-preservation, and made for home.

But aside from all that, what was so special about her?

She had made the mistake of trusting someone, and what good had that done? None whatsoever. Diana was dead, as she had to constantly remind herself. The only person who had ever selflessly cared about her, and she was dead because of Faith´s very existence. 

She´d never made the same mistake again. Cordelia and Buffy were cool, but one day they´d realize how hanging around her would just get them killed and she´d be alone once more.

What concerned her at the moment was the power that was currently building up inside of the Hellmouth. It was nearing May, which the Scoobies had fondly called "Apocalypse season".

 _Fucking perfect. Fate sure is a bitch, ain´t she? Messing with people´s lives like it´s a game of chess, and we´re all the chess pieces. Fuck!_ Growling, Faith slammed her fist against the wood, creating a small dent in the oak, Giles could scold her sorry ass later. Letting out a heavy sigh through her nose, she rested her head against her knees, willing herself, with great difficulty, to calm down. 

Faith had heard a little of the Powers that Be from Wesley, who surprisingly, knew quite a bit about them. All that power and they just _watched_. Watched as an innocent group of _kids_ were repeatedly dragged into a needless war against the Powers of Evil and all that shit.

If people like Willow, Xander, Cordelia and Oz were truly not apart of the fight, why would PTB not stop them? Why let them fight and possibly get themselves killed?

Was it that they _wanted_ them to fight? Or did they _really_ believe in free will? The right to choose your own path, even it turned out to be a waste?

She and Buffy were slayers. _They_ fought. _They_ had the powers. _Everything_. 

And yet...people like the Scoobies still fought every night; getting up every single night to patrol or to do research, just so that they could help their friend see another sunrise.

It was frustrating. Faith had always thought that she could understand and read people pretty well, but despite this, the Scoobies were unpredictable in their actions. Yes, they were gullible. Dumb? Sometimes. Annoying as hell? All the time. But predictable? No. They weren´t even cowards. Not even close. They stood up for what they believed in; stared Evil in the eyes unblinkingly and were unfazed by everything they saw and heard. They were terrified; she could practically smell the fear rolling off them in waves, _but they did it anyway_. 

And for what? Friendship? _Love_? Those little, _insignificant_ people out there on the streets who Faith herself had never even _tried_ to give a damn about?

Maybe. Maybe all of them at once. Maybe sh-no- _people_ could have friends. Maybe the world wasn´t so bad. 

Faith chuckled bitterly. Too bad she wouldn´t live long enough to find out.

But one thing was clear, she wasn´t going to go quietly.

Not even in the slightest.

**Finite**

**Author's Note:**

> Woah, intense.
> 
> Yes, Faith is enrolled at Sunnydale High. Why...might be explained later. I´m pretty sure you guys can come up with several ways this would be possible. 
> 
> And yes, Faith is a !Smart Faith in my fic. She´s not some really, really smart kid whose teachers loved her and school was a safe-haven, blah blah blah, but she has her strengths. School was not a nice place for her. She hated it actually, so you can imagine how much convincing it took to even get her to consider the option. 
> 
> This little tidbit can also help you guys in figuring out how exactly she even agreed to it in the first place. After all, whose opinion would she respect and value more than anyone else she´s ever known in her life?
> 
> I like getting you guys to fill in the gaps yourself by using information, which you can get by going back to other fics and putting it together with other bits of information in another fic. It keeps it interesting!
> 
> The first person who figures it out (and sends me a review :3) gets a free cookie!
> 
> xo


End file.
